In my AFC North Preview I referred to the AFC North as the most drama fill division in football. Looking at The Cincinnati Bengals arrest records, The Baltimore Ravens duel murderers and The Pittsburgh Steelers alleged (again) rapist Quarterback you have to agree with me.
Still no player in the history of the NFL has been the center of more drama than Princess Brett Favre.
If he isn’t crying like a little girl about a retirement that isn’t happening he is bitching about his bumps and bruises. I think I liked Brett better when he was an alcoholic pill head. The new Brett pisses me off. A real Mississippi man sticks to his word and is true to his friends and teammates.
Most of all a true Mississippi man can hold his dope and booze. I was born and raised in Yazoo, Mississippi right next to Panther Swamp. Not pretty little Gulfport like Princess Brett. Until Brett Favre mans up and makes a decision about his retirement the Minnesota Vikings could be in limbo.
Brett’s old team is not in limbo at all. The Green Bay Packers are masters of their own destiny. Aaron Rodgers is developing into a premier NFL Quarterback. This is despite an offensive line with bigger holes than a Biloxi streetwalker. Rodgers has been sacked more thank any other QB in the league.
The Green Bay Packers need to address two issues. They need to get Aaron Rodgers some protection and some targets other than Donald Driver and Greg Jennings. Driver and Jennings are great receivers but The Pack needs more depth at the position.
I think this year is put up or shut up time for Mike McCarthy. The Green Bay Packers not only need to go deep into the division but deep into the playoffs for the Green Bay Packers to keep Big Mike another year despite his contract covering him into 2013.
If The Green Bay Packers have issues with depth with receivers The Chicago Bears are beyond repair. The Chicago Bears receiving corps is made up of Arena football star Rashied Davis, Devin Aromashodu who gets cut so much he should be covered in band-aids and rookie Freddie Barnes.
The Chicago Bears also have Devin Hester but let’s be serious. Devin Hester is a return man and a special teams player not a dynamic receiver. Devin Hester is not known for his hands. To put it nicely Devin Hester couldn’t catch AIDS in a gay bar.
With Brian Urlacher heading into his 10th season and Lance Briggs entering his 7th the window is closing for The Chicago Bears defense. This is with an offence that is very lackluster. If Freddie Barnes doesn’t make an impact immediately on this team Jay Cutler will not get the chance to realize his potential once again. Speaking of unrealized potential we have the Detroit Lions.
I still can’t figurre out The Detroit Lions they have a great pass rush and a solid Quarterback in Matthew Stafford. Still there is a lot of word to be done in Detriot. The automotive industry has moved out, Motown Record is gone and The Lions have a long hard road to the playoffs. Isn’t time as a country we just bulldozed Detroit and started over? We could probably buy Detroit on the cheap seeing the Real Estate market is softer than Jimmy Johnson’s penis.
The bottom line is The Minnesota Vikings have this division wrapped up. The Minnesota Vikings killer offence is made up of Sidney Rice, Bernard Berrian, Percy Harvin and tight end Visanthe Shiancoe add monster running back Adrian Peterson to the mix…holy shit! Prince could be under center and you would still win the division.
Note to Prince don’t start packing your bags for The Metrodome just yet. We still have to wait for Princess Farve’s announcement and Brad Childress still wants to bring you in for a workout first. While we wait for Princess Farve let’s check out these true princesses from the NFC North.