Harry Potter and the Magnificent Blue Orbs

I don’t get this whole Harry Potter nonsense. There is no need for 8 films in a series unless the film is about Jason Voorhees. What makes these Harry Potter films really stupid (besides their titles) is they have not evolved with their audiences. These Harry Potter fans that ten years ago would stand outside a Borders bookstore at midnight to buy this drivel are in their twenties now. Enough already with this Hogwarts crap – grow up. Not only do these Harry Potter fans need to grow up but the characters in the film need to mature a bit.

Why hasn’t Harry Potter, played by Daniel Radcliffe, banged Hermione Granger, played by Emma Watson, yet? There is no way Harry Potter would have dragged this chick around for 10 years without trying to hit it. If this is a 10 year cock tease Harry Potter must have the worst case of blue balls in testicular history.

I could be way off base with my assumptions, but is Harry Potter more interested in putting his Philosopher’s Stone in Ron Weasley’s Chamber of Secrets? Just saying!

If we don’t see Emma Watson riding on Daniel Radcliffe’s magic wand in the next movie I am guessing we will see it soon. This trio of actors have no star power outside of the Harry Potter franchise. Mark my words Emma Watson will do 3 failed films post-Harry Potter. After her 3rd film goes straight to DVD, will come the 16th minute of fame.

We will see the desperate plea for attention in the form of nude photos, nip slip pics or an all famous leaked sex tape. Then comes the 17th minute…SciFi conventions and ComicCon.  

J. K. Rowling may as well have Harry Potter hit it now and get it over with. It is time to drain the Magnificent Blue Orbs.