Major League IV is the Answer to all of Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan’s Problems

The big news this morning is the massive sweep of the drug cartels in Mexico. A quarter ton of cocaine was seized along with a 40,000 pounds of marijuana, 64 pounds of methamphetamine and 21 pounds of heroin!

As I was watching the news I was thinking about the size of a tiny coke spoon and how long it would take to dig through that mountain of blow. Would it take a lifetime? Who could possibly pull it off…or even afford all that blow? That’s when one man came to mind – Charlie Sheen.

If the U.S. and Mexico are serious about successfully ending the war on drugs. There is only one solution. Send Charlie Sheen to Mexico with a bus full of porn stars and a pocket full or Viagra. Now that Two and a Half Men is on hiatus. Charlie Sheen has plenty of time to rid Mexico of the white plague.

This would work out great for Charlie, Mexican hookers are less expensive than their American counter parts. For the same $20,000 Charlie Sheen paid Capri Anderson for a night, he could live in a Mexican brothel for a year… meals included. 20 grand is nothing for Charlie especially if he finds work down there – Major League IV: White Lines, Foul Balls (Working Title)

Charlie Sheen has stated that he would love to do another Major League movie. It was also announced that the script for the next installment is ready to roll. The Major League series started off with Tom Berenger’s character Jake Taylor in Mexico, maybe Major League IV could end there. What a great way to end the series. We all know Tom Berenger and Rene Russo will not return for Major League IV….add Tom Sizemore and Lindsay Lohan to the cast and Mexico will be dry of Cocaine in a month.

The only casting problem I see is, can Wesley Snipes get work release to do a film in Mexico? This time around Willie Mays Hayes (Wesley Snipes) could be the one getting the call to the big leagues from jail. Life does imitate art, doesn’t it.

Charlie Sheen could rid Mexico of drugs, stimulate the Mexican economy as well as stimulate the nether regions of a host of Mexican hookers. The win-win is America loses Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan for a few months. We also get a great direct to DVD movie out of the deal. Sometimes these thing work themselves out don’t they.