I don’t know to call this one… a review, a premonition, a preview or just the plain cold truth, but here is. Save your money! Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 1 is going to suck even worse than the previous Twilight movies. I am so surprised that this franchise can continue to march mindless tweens, sexually frustrated housewives and confirmed bachelors into the theaters.
If Abduction, Water For Elephants and The Runaways taught us anything, it is that this trio cannot act. Kristen Stewart, Taylor Lautner and Robert Pattinson couldn’t act like they were drowning in a lake with anvils around their necks. The wooden, unconvincing performances they deliver are almost as bad as the moronic dialog in their basic cable-quality movies. Seriously, is this crap written for people with head injuries?
So, my review… Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 1 will suck. I don’t need to see it to know that. The only movie in history that has a chance of being worse is Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2… or should I say Twilight Breaking Wind: man do these films stink.
So you have your choice: you can believe me, or you can waste $12 watching this crap. If you are a true fan, I guess I can forgive you. Kristen Stewart, Taylor Lautner and Robert Pattinson won’t be doing too many movies after Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2 so, what the hell, catch them before they start doing soft-core porn and mall openings. There wont be too many more Twilight premieres and I am guessing a Twilight Premiere is like the Superbowl for mindless tweens, sexually frustrated housewives and confirmed bachelors.
