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LOWELL -- Police say it started when a 42-year-old Lowell man used cash advances from credit cards to fill a duffel bag with $62,000, spent an hour or two drinking cognac, and then set out in search of a prostitute.
What would result, said a police official who declined to be named, was one of the most sordid tales city police have seen in quite a while.
The 42-year-old man in question, who police have not identified, found his alleged prostitute in the Lower Highlands Saturday, where he rode on his bike about 8 p.m., with a Nike duffel bag slung on his shoulder.

He met Jessica Garcia, 30, of 46 Aiken Ave., Unit 2, Lowell, in front of 143 Westford St., and followed her into the basement after she solicited him, according to a police report.

Inside the basement, the two negotiated a price of $30 for sex, and when the man retrieved the money from his bag, Garcia noticed how much cash he had, according to police.

Garcia also noticed just how drunk the would-be customer was, and decided to take his money, police said.
As the man sat intoxicated in a chair, Garcia tied the man's belt around his ankles, and then suddenly shoved him, knocking him to the floor as she grabbed the duffel bag and ran off, according to police.
The man soon appeared at the Highlands precinct reporting the robbery about 8:30 p.m.
Though the man's story sounded bizarre, detectives took a description of the woman, and began checking at local hotels to see if anyone fitting that description had recently checked in and paid in cash.

At the DoubleTree Hotel downtown, employees confirmed that someone had, and that the woman fit the description.

About 3 a.m., officers knocked on the woman's room door and were invited inside, immediately spotting two large stacks of $20 and $50 bills on a nightstand.

When investigators asked the man and woman in the room to come to the station to answer some questions, they noticed a stack of $100 bills behind the woman.

In all, $44,521 was found in the hotel room, police said.
Garcia had spent some of the money on Lottery tickets and alcohol, but the rest is unaccounted for, according to police.
Police also said they plan to investigate and make sure the 42-year-old man obtained the cash legally. Garcia is charged with unarmed robbery. She was to be arraigned today in Lowell District Court.
What the hell? That's the worst Law and Order episode ever.

3dR3

Speng Wrote:Perhaps he was trying to hit the gerbil that somehow crawled into his asshole.

so he was playing asshole wack-a-mole?

3dR3

what a fucking moron.....
I was somehow expecting a more.... interesting ending to that story, but still the guy's gotta be a complete moron. Fill bag with cash, get drunk, ride bike to pick up hooker, get robbed. Like, duh!! You fucking moron.

Well, I guess it does belong in this thread then. huge grin
Dumbasses are going to rue the day I become a judge!
He had $62,000 in-hand and went to a $30 prostitute?
[Image: 2_21_081208_hoopsinternal.jpg]

Spain might have high hopes of bringing the Olympic flame back to the Iberian peninsula in 2016, but the country that played host to the Barcelona Olympics in 1992 is sporting a public relations black eye today.

The Spanish Basketball Federation took out a full-page ad in the country's largest sports newspaper, Marca, wishing the men's and women's teams good luck in the Beijing games. The photo accompanying the ad, however — showing all team members making a slant-eyed gesture — raised eyebrows and sparked international outrage.

The heavily favored Spanish team, the reigning world champions, took the court Tuesday against China, and was greeted with typical Chinese polite applause — mixed with a rare sprinkle of boos. Spain went on to win in overtime, 85-75.

The Guardian newspaper reported that no one from the federation felt the ad was inappropriate, and that no offense was intended.

3dR3

Hooch Wrote:He had $62,000 in-hand and went to a $30 prostitute?

.....on his bicycle. :confused:

3dR3

Prog Wrote:[Image: 2_21_081208_hoopsinternal.jpg]

Spain might have high hopes of bringing the Olympic flame back to the Iberian peninsula in 2016, but the country that played host to the Barcelona Olympics in 1992 is sporting a public relations black eye today.

The Spanish Basketball Federation took out a full-page ad in the country's largest sports newspaper, Marca, wishing the men's and women's teams good luck in the Beijing games. The photo accompanying the ad, however — showing all team members making a slant-eyed gesture — raised eyebrows and sparked international outrage.

The heavily favored Spanish team, the reigning world champions, took the court Tuesday against China, and was greeted with typical Chinese polite applause — mixed with a rare sprinkle of boos. Spain went on to win in overtime, 85-75.

The Guardian newspaper reported that no one from the federation felt the ad was inappropriate, and that no offense was intended.

now that's just fucking funny right there.... huge grin