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Moron of the week
Securb Wrote:How was the guy in the car that was passing by as it exploded! Great video.

Sitting in a pile of last nights recycled Nachos Bell Grande would be my guess.
Gummi Lighthouses: When Candy Design Goes Terribly, Hilariously Wrong

[Image: gummi_lighthouses.jpg]
^^ oh my god, that is fucking hilarious....

You know someone in product planning is just shitting himself laughing right now. "I can't believe they approved it!!"
Copper thief's fatal 11,000 volts

By Andrew Robinson
A SCRAP metal dealer stealing copper from a disused mill accidentally caused a huge electrical explosion, an inquest heard yesterday.

John Roberts, 39, suffered deep burns to his face, arms, hands and chest but managed to leave the mill, climb a high wall and drive to his girlfriend's house several miles away.

His girlfriend, Nina Hurley, said that Mr Roberts arrived screaming at her house around 5am.

"I could hear a strange screaming noise," she said in a statement: "He screamed 'Help me'. He came in and sat down. His breathing was not good, he was going into shock, he could barely speak. His T-shirt had been burnt off and his face was all blackened. His eyelashes and hair were all burnt."

The hearing in Leeds was told that Mr Roberts – known to many as Bod – was taken to hospital but died on August 14 last year in the burns unit at Pinderfields Hospital, Wakefield, 10 days after the accident.

He had suffered deep burns to 37 per cent of his body and died from multiple organ failure, sepsis and burns.

The inquest heard that Mr Roberts, who described himself as a self-employed scrap metal dealer, entered Park Mill in South Street, Morley, by scaling a wall and removing padlocks.

He forcibly entered a locked room containing a transformer, ignoring a warning notice about 11,000 volts and the tell-tale buzzing of the transformer.

Mr Roberts, of Winrose Avenue, Belle Isle, Leeds, was in the process of removing copper bars from a switch box when there was a huge explosion which possibly vaporised the tool he was using.
Cardiac arrest: Man faked heart attack when dinner bill arrived

Posted: July 3, 2008

Robert P. Farnam is, police say, a faker.

Monday, for instance.

According to a criminal complaint and police records, Farnam took a cab to Mayfair Mall that day and, rather than squaring up with the cabbie, pretended to have a heart attack.

The cabbie left unpaid.

Farnam, who is 5’10” and weighs 269 pounds, then went to the Applebee’s at Mayfair and ordered something to eat. He had a sirloin steak, salad, mashed potatoes, a soda, a strawberry smoothie and a brownie. His bill came to $22.66.

Again, he pretended to have a heart attack. The Wauwatosa Fire Department whisked him to Wisconsin Heart Hospital.

A doctor at the hospital, William T. Kumprey, was tired of seeing Farnam.

Farnam had been to the hospital several times in the last month or so. He had used his fake heart attack routine at Silk — an exotic lounge — at several restaurants and while getting out of various cabs.

The doctor told Farnam he would call the police the next time he caught him faking the clutch of death to avoid paying his bills.

Farnam let it slip that he had, earlier that very day, after a hearty meal for which he did not pay, absconded to Froedtert Hospital.

The doctor called police.

Farnam told police he had $350 at home but hadn’t taken any money with him that day. He wasn’t planning on needing it.

When police checked Farnam’s record, they found five priors for similar offenses this year alone, and several priors in the years before.

He was on probation, and a condition of his probation was that he keep away from various restaurants, including Famous Dave’s and George Webb.

Applebee’s was not on the list, and so Farnam avoided being placed on a probation hold.

He was, however, charged Thursday with fraud on a restaurant, habitual criminality.

If convicted, Farnam, who is 52 and lives in Waukesha, faces up to two years and nine months in prison.

[Image: farnam_070408_184.jpg]
ok... where are the "i lit some fireworks out of my ass and this happened" stories?
3dR3 Wrote:ok... where are the "i lit some fireworks out of my ass and this happened" stories?

Those guys are still recovering from the injuries.
Speng Wrote:Those guys are still recovering from the injuries.

or getting their assholes sewn back together so they look OK for their funeral.
3dR3 Wrote:ok... where are the "i lit some fireworks out of my ass and this happened" stories?

A York County man is in jail tonight after setting off fireworks inside his Sanford apartment. The fireworks set the building on fire and caused extensive damage to the ten-unit building.

Investigators say 25-year-old Shawn Dennis suffered several burns and was treated at Goodall Hospital in Sanford, before he was arrested and charged with arson. Dennis is now at the York County Jail where he's being held on $5,000 cash bail.

Firefighters were able to limit the fire damage to one apartment on the third floor, but the rest of the building suffered water damage. Click here to watch video.
Securb Wrote:A York County man is in jail tonight after setting off fireworks inside his Sanford apartment.

One of my friends did that back when he moved into his first apartment. We'd throw firecrackers into an ammo box filled with stuff and survey the damage.

The dumbest thing we did, and it's a miracle we didn't get hurt, was when he purchased several quarter sticks of dynamite. He lived on the second story and in our beer induced haze decided it'd be cool to throw one out the window. He lit the fuse, went to throw it out the window and it bounced off the window frame and landed at his feet. He grabbed it and tossed it out the window just as it exploded. Everyone thought lightning stuck the building.

We did some other stupid shit with the quarter sticks, I'm laughing just thinking about it.

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