LLL. I have a question for ya.

[Big Flannel]

Since we know you like to browse our little slice of internet heaven, I figured I'd pose an inquiry (seeing as we openly welcome differences of opinion).

You claim to be a studio guy or an educator or some bullshit so I'd figure you would have a wealth of knowledge on the subject of TONE.

You seem to parade your resumé as an Expert on all things Eddie, but I have a more general question: What does a Cuck use for a rig?

If I wanted to sound like a middle aged loser cuck who hasn't smelled a pussy since highschool, where would i start? What amp sounds the loneliest? What guitar cries like the mania in your head? What picks accentuate the frustrations of knowing that your basement rendition of Eruption doesn't have a single like on Soundcloud?

Also, what can I do to work on my tremolo picking? People have told me to practice the motion, but I don't always have a pick to working on SHORT, SMALL, and FAST strokes. Barring the fact that I can't simply jerk your useless clit-like penis, what would you recommend as an alternative? I'm looking for a routine.

I think that's it.

I really appreciate all your help and hope to hear from you soon. Stay strong, man. It ain't easy being greasy.