Moron of the week

[Securb]

JUST WHEN YOU THINK YOU SEEN THE END OF THE STUPIDITY

This guy's name isn't Chet by any chance, is it?
I've heard the song for years; but until now wasn't aware of the origin.
You know the one I'm talking about: ' Chet's Nuts Roasting on an Open Fire !'

[3dR3]

wow, what a fucking moron.

[Prog]

Why did he film it?
Why did you find it?
Why did I watch it?

[Securb]

Why did he film it?
Why did you find it?
Why did I watch it?

He's a guy
I'm a guy
You're a guy

[3dR3]

correction, he's a flaming guy....

[Speng]

I bet that smelled terrible, burnt pubic hair.

That's right up there with that clip of the chick taking a shit in her panties...the explosive hot poop.

[Prog]

The ex-cop who is a suspect in the disappearance of his fourth wife and whose third wife died suspiciously in a bathtub is planning to walk down the aisle for a fifth time.

Drew Peterson, 54, is engaged again, his lawyer and publicist confirmed Wednesday to FOXNews.com. Peterson declined to confirm the engagement during an interview with MyFOXChicago.

"Normally the media has ruined every relationship I've had," Peterson told the station. "This is something very personal to me, this is something I didn't want out."

Though Peterson is still married to his fourth wife, Stacy, who was 23 when she disappeared last year, he has found a new 23-year-old fiancée, he told "Drew Peterson Exposed" author Derek Armstrong Tuesday.

"The kids have met her," said Armstrong. "They like her and they know about this engagement."

Peterson has two young children, Anthony, 6, and Lacy, 4, with Stacy Peterson. The missing mom's family contends she is dead.

"Oh my God, I’m speechless," Pam Bosco, a spokeswoman for Stacy Peterson's family told FOXNews.com when informed of Drew Peterson's engagement. "History repeats itself, so I imagine that that’s the same situation he had before: He’d be involved with somebody when he was getting rid of the one before."

Armstrong said the new fiancée, whom Peterson refused to identify, lives within 15 minutes of Peterson's Bolingbrook, Ill., home. He said the couple have been dating about four months. Lawyer Joel Brodsky and publicist Glenn Selig did not identify the woman either.

Selig said the engagement happened "sometime within the last couple of days."

A sticking point for Peterson is that he is currently married.

"This is not uncommon for Drew," said Selig. "When he was married to Kathleen still, he was in the process of divorcing Kathleen when he proposed to Stacy. He’s done this before and, you know, he seems very happy."

Late Wednesday, Brodsky told FOXNews.com, "[Peterson's fiancée] doesn't want to get involved in the media circus. He's genuinely fond of this girl and he doesn't want to scare her off."

Peterson met with high-profile Chicago attorney Jeffery M. Leving — a lawyer in the Elian Gonzalez case — earlier this year to see what his rights to a split might be.

Leving told FOXNews.com that Peterson had not yet filed for divorce.

Desertion for at least one year is grounds for divorce under Illinois law — though Peterson, as the divorce petitioner, would have to show he wasn't at fault for causing his wife to leave, Leving said.

Peterson has been at the center of the investigation into the whereabouts of his wife, who vanished on Oct. 28, 2007.

After Stacy's disappearance, the body of Peterson's third wife, Kathleen Savio, was exhumed, and her 2004 bathtub drowning was re-labeled a homicide.

Earlier this year, Will County State's Attorney James Glasgow issued a statement about the Savio and Stacy Peterson cases, indicating that a special grand jury is still weighing evidence in both.

"I fully expect there to be a resolution in at least one of these investigations in the near future," Glasgow said.

Stacy Peterson's family is pinning its hopes on that resolution.

"You’ve just got to stay focused on the investigation and hope that as the Illinois state prosecutor said, that they’ll have [it] resolved soon," Bosco said.

[Speng]

Suspicious wife who demands to smell husband's genitals beaten

http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2008/dec/...eged-beater-g/

Police: Suspicious wife who demands to smell husband's genitals beaten

By Will Greenlee
Wednesday, December 17, 2008

PORT ST. LUCIE — Police are seeking an arrest warrant for a man accused of hitting his wife after she asked to smell his penis to determine whether he was cheating with another woman, according to a police report released Wednesday.

The 37-year-old victim told investigators her husband of three years punched her face and kicked her arms and legs Monday night after she accused him of having an affair.

The victim said she told her 25-year-old husband as he used the restroom "to display his penis to her so that she can smell it," the report states.

She said she asked him to show his genital area so she could determine whether he was cheating with another woman.

As she went to sniff her husband's penis, he reportedly punched her mouth and started to kick her when she was on the floor. The husband then fled the scene.

Police saw bruises and red marks on the victim's mouth, legs and arms.

She became uncooperative when told a warrant would be filed for her husband's arrest.

[Prog]

A lovers' quarrel almost ended in tragedy in the Chinese city of Kunming Friday, caught on camera by a passing photographer.

An unidentified man held a woman said to be his girlfriend out of a third floor window for more than two hours as police tried to talk him down.

He finally agreed to leave the building, but took the woman with him as a hostage, holding a knife to her throat as crowds gathered in the street around the building in the Yunnan provincial capital. In the end, specialist hostage negotiators persuaded the man to give himself up.

Bizarrely, there was a similar, although apparently unrelated, hostage-taking incident in Kunming on December 19, 2005 .

Indeed, Kunming seems to have quite a reputation for hostage-taking, including an incident earlier this month in which a knife-wielding man injured three women before taking a nurse hostage in the French-owned Carrefour supermarket.

That stand-off lasted more than four hours before police tempted the man out with a bowl of soup — and a sniper killed him with a single shot to the temple.

[Hooch]

That stand-off lasted more than four hours before police tempted the man out with a bowl of soup — and a sniper killed him with a single shot to the temple.

Why does this sentence make me laugh so much?