The Tiger Woods Thread

[Securb]

Is it just me or does anyone else think it is funny that Nike's tag line is "Just Do It", American Express "Do More" and Gatorade is "Is It In You"

[3dR3]

hahaha...... oh the irony.

[Securb]

So I put out the question to all of the TMR brethren. What did we learn here. Did anything positive come out of this whole episode? I guess I will go first.

• I learnt that cellphones might not cause brain cancer but they can really fuck up your teeth.
  

• Reverend Al and Jeese only show up for the easy cases
  

[3dR3]

I need to be careful where I put my wood, 9 iron...... ah fuck it! I can't even stand all the golf jokes.

[Securb]

It is near the Christmas break of the school year. The students have turned in all their work and there is really nothing more to do. All the children are restless and the teacher decides to have an early dismissal.

Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly can leave early today."

Little Johnny says to himself "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question."

Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."

Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home." Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.

Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."

Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go." Johnny is even madder than before.

Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."

Teacher: "That's right Nancy, you may also leave." Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer to any of the questions.

When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut!"

The teacher turns around: "NOW WHO SAID THAT?"

Johnny: "TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO NOW?"

[Securb]

Woods reportedly left the family home to hang out backstage at a Nickelback concert in Orlando.

The Canadian rock band, who have a number of songs with sexually charged lyrics on their sixth album "Dark Horse," played Amway Arena in Florida on Monday night.

TMZ reported that Woods, who is known to be a big Nickelback fan, was shrouded by security backstage while the band did their thing.

Another entertainment news site, RadarOnline has revealed that Woods' wife Elin Nordegren boarded a private jet Monday heading home to Sweden.

[3daddict]

Woods, who is known to be a big Nickelback fan.

Ok, I think Tiger is probably a very nice guy that needs some sort of intervention. Maybe, the kind of unconditional man-love that he didn't receive as a child. To get that, I think he should fly all us TMR folk to the exotic local of his choice for the best time, friends and hookers money can buy and really find himself. Anyway, at least we can get our rocks off and he can develop a taste for the deeper and more subtle things in life like Lady Gaga

[Hooch]

I think he should fly all us TMR folk to the exotic local of his choice

amen. I'd say it would make a great series of articles, but none of us would come back after a vacation of neverending cash, babes, and booze

[3dR3]

amen. I'd say it would make a great series of articles, but none of us would come back after a vacation of neverending cash, babes, and booze

hey i'm living that dream....... although the cash is all Monopoly money and the babes are on a screen instead of my couch.... the booze, well that's easy i guess.