My Evening Adventure

[Speng]

I've been in a funk lately, bummed out and everything, so I was looking for something to try and cheer myself up. There's an area at one of the parks here where the squirrels are really friendly, you're not supposed to feed them but it's evident everyone does. I figured "screw it", I'll grab a sandwich and something for the squirrels, go to the park and have an early dinner by the lake. I got out and it's like a petting zoo, the squirrels come right up to you, like two dozen squirrels and a few chipmunks are all over eating...it's pretty cool. Anyway, enough about the animals.

I grab my food and walk near the bluffs above the lake. The path is pretty washed out from last week's rain so I have to walk through the woods before I can find where the path is safe and a good spot to sit. I sat down and ate, ignoring the fact that two billion gallons of untreated sewage was dumped in the lake last Thursday.

After maybe fifteen minutes I get up to leave, figuring I'd attempt to take the washed out path back to my car and I see some dude standing less then twenty feet away from me on the path. His back was towards me and at first glance it appeared like he was taking a leak. My first thought was, why would you piss right on the path? So I'm standing there and suddenly realize he's not pissing, his pants are down to his ankles and he's gyrating his hips. It takes me a few more seconds to realize that the dude is sodomizing another dude...right there on the path. Obviously they had no idea that anyone was there. I got the Hell out of there, but not before making enough noise that they knew someone was nearby.

I took a different way back to my car, it turns out they were humping less then fifteen feet from a heavily traveled bike path and fifty feet from the parking lot where I was feeding the squirrels. WTF is wrong with people, of all the secluded places in the park, they go right there?

[Hooch]

have you plucked your eyes out yet?

[Speng]

I've watched an hour of lesbian porn to try and purge the vision out of my head.

I doubt I'll be going back to that area of the park anytime soon. It's a small parking lot, only room for twelve cars or so, you'd think they'd wonder where the people that were parked in the cars went before they started humping.

[Hooch]

I've watched an hour of lesbian porn to try and purge the vision out of my head.

I doubt I'll be going back to that area of the park anytime soon. It's a small parking lot, only room for twelve cars or so, you'd think they'd wonder where the people that were parked in the cars went before they started humping.

now you just need another hour for the other eye.

That is so fucked up. What if someone did what you did with their kid and ran into that?

I wonder if that is one of those "places" where gay guys go.

[Securb]

I wonder if that is one of those "places" where gay guys go.

I think you can stop wondering.

[Speng]

That is so fucked up. What if someone did what you did with their kid and ran into that?

I wonder if that is one of those "places" where gay guys go.

If someone was walking from the other direction they would have been face to face with them, try explaining that to a kid. I didn't realize how close they were to the bike trail or parking lot until I walked back, I was a little disoriented from walking through the woods. As I was walking to my car some guy was walking his dog down the bike path, I was tempted to tell him to let his dog loose in that direction.

Shit, I hope that area isn't a new gay hangout, it's a nice place. There was another area where the cops were always busting dudes trolling for dudes. The city's solution was to chop down a huge area of trees.

[Hooch]

I think you can stop wondering.

Well, there's this one area by me where the guys.... I mean, I don't know anything about that place.

[Securb]

I worked maintenance in our local City Hall one summer later to find out the basement bathroom was listed as a cruising spot. Thank god I wasn't on the cleaning crew. They had to hose the place out daily.

[Gator]

I worked maintenance in our local City Hall one summer later to find out the basement bathroom was listed as a cruising spot. Thank god I wasn't on the cleaning crew. They had to hose the place out daily.

Hey, isnt' that the summer you met George Michael???? Hmmm

[Securb]

Hey, isnt' that the summer you met George Michael???? Hmmm

Yes it was. Funny he couldnt stop talking about you.