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I'm a Social....
Listless Vessels!
(08-26-2014, 08:51 AM)karpathion Wrote: I guess I have a problem then. I'll cut one in a restaurant, while I'm giving my order.

Hell, I busted one yesterday while standing in line at the gas station.

My personal favorite is when my little girl does it. We took her to Build A Bear last weekend. She was standing in line behind about 5 other kids, waiting to get her new bear stuffed, she let a monster loose. I'm talking, I don't know how that fart came out of a 5 year old. Then says, " I farted!"

Guess who was next in line, now?

I farted in Walmart one night when I was drunk, and some black kid was like "eww dat's nasty" lol
I like trying to time my farts with the rope when I'm doing skipping at the gym.
When I was a younger lad I worked in a bodyshop. One morning the Canteen truck pulled up and they had something called a Barnyard special. Eggs, cheese, sausage, bacon and ham in a pita. One of the guys commented I was going to have the worst farts from the thing which turned into a challenge to me from the other guys to eat the worst things all day to give me the farts.

At mid morning break I had a tin of Hormel Chili, for lunch I had a steak and cheese sub with a chocolate milkshake. Around 2 in the afternoon the farts start and everyone in the shop is giggling. By 3 my boss is telling me to knock it off because the shop smelt so bad. You could smell my farts over the paint, thinner and bondo.

I couldn't stop farting I was getting stomach cramps so my boss sent me home early. My buddy drove me home we had to have the windows open all the way. Keep in mind I was young and it was a Friday so I was happy to be on my way.
You guys have the best bodily emission stories! I have lived a life of deprivation.
I knew you were a pretty 'regular' guy... :p
Listless Vessels!
(08-27-2014, 06:33 AM)Dr. Vegetable Wrote: You guys have the best bodily emission stories! I have lived a life of deprivation.

I was working at Woburn Foreign Motors Services. Hopefully the next time you are driving by the Toyota dealership on the junction of Rt 128 and Rt 93 my fart story brings a smile to your face.

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