Twilight’s Robert Pattinson Continues To Lose Movie Roles

It seems that Robert Pattinson was in the running for the lead in a biopic about cult music legend Jeff Buckley. Luckily for us fans, Reeve Carney (yeah this kid is a real actor) has been cast as the lead in the upcoming biopic. For those of you unfamiliar with Jeff Buckley, Jeff Buckley was the greatest musician that never was.

From Mtv: Since he was the son of cult songwriter Tim Buckley, Jeff Buckley faced more expectations and pre-conceived notions than most singer/songwriters. Perhaps it wasn’t surprising that Jeff Buckley’s music was related to his father’s by only the thinnest of margins. Buckley’s voice was grand and sweeping, which fit with the mock-operatic grandeur of his Van Morrison-meets-Led Zeppelin music.

For those of you unfamiliar with Robert Pattinson, Robert Pattinson is a talentless hack that couldn’t act like he was blind in the dark. So as the set of Twilight Breaking Dawn II goes dark, it becomes more apparent that this moron will not be working very long.

I hope the The Holy Trinity of Suck (Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart and the shirtless Taylor Lautner) bank their payday on this last movie. With the exception of mall openings and Kristen Stewart swinging on poles these hacks will never see another dime.

The Holy Trinity of Suck might get a few more direct-to-dvd roles and a few failed sitcoms. Eventually a sex tape or nude pictures will be released …I mean leaked …as a final desperate plea for attention. Kristen Stewart will probably take a quick lap through Showtime After Dark. Definitely nude and still talentless before slipping into obscurity or XXX porn.

So let’s get Twilight Breaking Dawn II released now. The sooner it gets released, the sooner we get to see Kristen Stewart naked on Showtime After Dark. And as far as Robert Pattinson goes, Rob I will tell you in advance to save time…yes I would like to supersize that extra value meal. Could you deliver that to my trailer?