Matthew Clemens, AKA The Philly Puker, is A Piece of Human Excrement

philly-loser-mainIf you came here looking for another “the Philly fans are at it again” article, you’ve come to the wrong place. Why? Because you are reading an article written by someone who was born and bred within the City of Brotherly Love’s limits. I’m certainly not going to defend Matthew Clemmens, his acts were indefensible. What he did had nothing to do with being a fan of any Philadelphia sports team, it was an individual act committed by a walking, talking and breathing piece of human garbage.

This past Wednesday night, as the Philadelphia Phillies were hosting the Washington Nationals, Michael Vangelo, an Easton, PA Police Captain, took his two daughters for a night out to enjoy a baseball game. Unfortunately, as it sometimes happens, a pair of drunken losers were sitting behind them. As the game progressed and the pair became increasingly more rowdy… and drunk, Vangelo reported them and one of them was escorted out. In retaliation for having the guy he shared a brain with ejected from the stadium, Clemens stuck his finger down his throat and tried to vomit on the Vangelo family. There are varying reports as to how successful he was, but it doesn’t make the act any less despicable.


Vangelo, and a large group of other Philly Fans in the area, held the piece of garbage down until the police could arrive. Clemens was arrested and charged with 15 counts of different offenses, including resisting arrest. It is unknown exactly how or where he received the black eye you see in his mug shot.

Now comes the easy part… ESPN and all of the other national sports and regular media outlets can roll out their standard “The Philly Fans are At it Again” headline and just plug in the new name and offense. They’ll mention the standard “throwing snowballs at Santa Claus” and probably roll out something more recent like the booing of Donovan McNabb on draft day.

Give it a rest guys. This was an event that could have happened anywhere and if it did, would never be reported because too much work would be involved for reporters and columnists throughout the country. They’d actually have to put some effort into the story, and time and effort seem to be at a premium these days in the media.

I’m sure in each story written it will never mentioned that it was a pack of fellow “Philly” fans being vigilant and taking down the fat slob.

I do have a personal message for Mr. Matthew Clemens. You are pretty lucky you weren’t sitting behind me and my family that night. If you tried to vomit on my son or daughter it would be an ambulance, or a hearse, taking you out of the stadium and not the police. And that is coming from a guy who, based on your lovely mug shot, probably weighs 100 to 150 pounds less than you.

He’s also lucky he didn’t do it at an Eagles game… those fans would have been much more “vigilant”.

Go Phils!