Tiger Woods Cheats on His Wife AND Eats Kittens!

Through his official website, Tiger Woods recently admitted that cheated on his wife and possibly had multiple affairs with several women. The admission stemmed from the press probing the auto accident issue and speculation that he, and his vehicle, was beaten with a golf club by his angry wife. Lost in the media circus is the most horrific revelation of Professional Golf’s former golden child…

Tiger Woods eats at least one live kitten before each tournament to enhance his performance.

.

[smartads]

Tiger eats his first kitten of the day

No details have been uncovered as of the posting of this article. The PGA has yet to comment on any of these recent allegations, but they fear that if this latest rumor true, it will set off a new trend of kitten eating among current PGA Tour members and future hopefuls.

We discussed the issue with a few college golfers this afternoon and one commented: “If eating a kitten each morning is going to give me a 300 yard drive, then point me to the nearest SPCA.”

Additional allegations are being released by the hour, continuing to do damage to the billion dollar boy’s once perfect reputation. The most recent revelation is that Woods has been photographed attending an “illegal” sporting event with another high-profile, yet controversial athlete.

If we can uncover this photo, we will post it for you below.

(edit: We found it!)